KK Graduates Kindergarten

Baby K graduated Kindergarten on Monday. 

My precious baby who started the year as Katherine or KK and then switched to Katie and finally tried to be "Catherine with a C," before I shut that down, grew and blossomed this year as much as her name. 

Her graduation on Monday she was big smiles and, in her own little way, stoic pauses. Tuesday night, with just one in class day left, she came downstairs after bedtime sobbing. "I don't want to leave Miss Julie. I will miss my friends." She buried herself deep into my shoulder, her muffled cries continuing for almost a half hour. 

 I kissed her head. I rubber her back, told her that I loved her,  and that moving on was hard, but grand things lay ahead. And then I sobbed. 

Because I do know grand things are ahead. But at the same time, it all feels like it goes so much faster with that second baby. 

Maybe it is because with Bonnie everything was new and we were still finding our footing so things sometimes felt like they were frozen in time as we navigated the newness of the most recent phase. 

Maybe it is because having witnessed Bonnie I now know how quickly time goes - how the cheeks melt away and the legs grow longer and the reaching for my hand just disappears one day. I know the kindergarten crafts and theme days and playground adventurers all too soon become multiplication tests and spelling lists and crayons sitting idle on the shelf. 

Maybe it is because, at only 20 months older than her brother, I often felt like some of her baby years were robbed from her and she had to grow up much faster than any of her other siblings - all enjoying at least three years before the next little one came along. 

Maybe it is because with a high risk pregnancy and the world in turmoil in 2020, she missed so much of those preschool years and I grieve for those experiences that were skipped. 

Or maybe this is just motherhood - with each new phase bringing the joy of what's next and the very clear reminder that our babies don't keep. 

Happy graduation, KK. I can't wait to see who you become - and what name goes with it.